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Thursday, 16 April 2009 11:08 |
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Some poems about Conor following his horrific skydiving crash. There was a young man from Artane,
Who liked to jump out of a plane,
But he soiled his trousers,
When he crossed at a thousand,
Cos he just knew it would all end in pain | - Cianer | There was a young man from Portmarnock
Whose father in law was a sky jock
Good Friday’s events
Proved he had no sense
The sky jock was simply a dumb cock | - Conor
| There was an old man with some nerve
He jumped from the sky to the turf
but when he hit the grass
His leg went into his ass
But still that's not bad for a Smurf | - Flash | A pretty green field in Offaly
Was as flat and as smooth as could be
Young Conor went past
Said "that looks like a blast"
And ploughed it up with his knee | - Cianer | There once was a man from old Texas
Who went skydiving one morning for breakfast
He yelled for his mum
Pulled his leg from his bum
Said "I didn't think my knee could do this" | - Hayman | Conor McAnally sat on a plane
Conor McAnally had a great léim
All the King's horses and all the King's men
Said "Humpty Dumpty was a fucking doddle compared to this" | - Cianer | There was a producer from LA
Who decided to make a display
He jumped from a plane
But ended in pain
Upstaging granddaughter’s birthday! | - Macaroni | Conor, Conor the jumper-upon-er
Fell in a bog and we thought he was a goner
He heard a crunch where his thigh was
And saw a field where the sky was
The ground seemed much higher
than twas twenty years prior
and thought to himself "oh shit
there seems to be tullo more of it"
and as he lay aground moaning
he blamed the re-zoning
and the government for unlawfully
raising the ground around Offaly
"yes that's it" he said,"sure it must be.
due to a overactive building industry,
That building trade must've really been somethin'
if they put a mountain here where i was supposed to be jumpin'! | - Flash | A surgeon retiring soon
Did not see the patient as a boon
"I've no interest in learning
For the golf course I'm yearning
Why not just dig the bone out with a spoon?" | - Cianer |
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